Went to Niagara on Saturday (wow why does that feel like so long ago)? It was absolutely incredible. The Maid of the Mist boat ride is by far one of the most mind-blowing experiences I’ve ever had, and I’ve been lucky enough to have some pretty fantastic ones to start with but that… I don’t even have words for that. Made me so grateful just to be here and be able to see the things I see and do the things I do. The town around Niagara is super super touristy mind you. If you’re not prepared for it the tackiness may offend, but Jordan had already warned me about it so honestly I just thought it was all kind of funny. There’s things like a Guinness World Records museum, Ripleys believe it or not museum, incredibly poor quality wax museums and goodness knows what else everywhere you look. Tourist shops are really big there too. I saw the coolest and most touristy jacket that was simply awesome – it was a zip up hoodie with “CANADA” plastered across the front, but it was actually ridiculously warm and comfortable. Definitely wish I’d bought it. Instead I bought a couple of other things to send to someone back home who specifically asked for it. Still on the look out for a few birthday presents for people. You guys really need to stop aging.

After Niagara we went to a town called Niagara-on-the-Lake. It’s kind of a tourist town but a far less tacky version. It kind of reminds me of Tanunda, but more upmarket and well manicured. It was absolutely beautiful. I adored all the houses we passed along the way – really old cottage style places covered in vines and greenery. Even the mansions just seemed kind of old world and tasteful to me. It was like looking at the house I always dreamed of having as a kid, rope swing and all. Wandering through the town was a lot of fun too. We avoided doing any shopping as it was all little boutique style places where the prices would make your eyes bug out of your head (frankly, the price of most things here will make your eyes bug out of your head anyway), but I did end up getting an ice cream from this place called Moo that boasts itself as being “Canada’s Best Ice Cream”. I have to admit, they had pretty fair claim to the title insomuch as I’ve seen anyway.

As to uni itself, the classes I’m taking are actually REALLY damned interesting. My history course is by far my favourite, which makes me mourn for not having chosen history as my major in the first place, but from what I understand the history courses offered at Adelaide Uni are nothing like this. The way they do their assessments seems to be far more balanced and fair too. It’s definitely a HUGE amount of work, but thus far it’s all stuff that really catches my attention. Even my English courses this semester are pretty heavily steeped in history. My US Latina/o course is absolutely fascinating to me, mostly because American (and I use the term to refer to the whole continent, not just the US) history is completely foreign to me, so it’s all brand new and fresh and exciting. Well, and depressing. But. Ya know. That’s history for you.
The history course is called Popular Culture and Punishment, and it covers the period from like 1500-1900ish around the United Kingdom and what sorts of crimes were prevalent and how they were punished etc. I am absolutely loving every minute of it. We’ve really only had the intro lecture so far, wherein they gave us a brief rundown of what was going on historically at certain points (and boy did I need it – they never did teach us anything but modern history, much to my chagrin) and it just immediately reminded me of 2005 when I was going around Europe listening to Mr. Murphy give me brief rundowns of the history of all these different places we went to. I love learning more about that period, and the subject matter, whilst gruesome, is downright fascinating. We’re actually going to be looking at serial killers and the witch hunt and so forth. It’s fantastic.
My last subject is called Literature in History, but it’s less history based than you would expect given the title. Essentially courses here are REALLY determined by the professors that run it. If you have a different lecturer (which, given the way the courses are structured here, is kinda the equivalent of having a different TUTOR in a class) your subject matter will be COMPLETELY different. You’ll have different books set and everything. My particular prof has chosen to focus on literature that came out of WWII and the holocaust, but with a broader focus than just books. We’re looking at plays, films, art works, songs etc. Honestly that’s usually enough to make me groan in despair because I am USELESS with anything but huge blocks of writing, but thus far it’s still pretty interesting. The prof has essentially based the course around Trauma theory, which is an entirely new aspect of literature for me to be looking at. Combined with my interest in and knowledge of psychology, it’s proving to kind of be right up my alley in a lot of ways. It’ll definitely be incredibly challenging, but it’s actually the kind of challenge I think I’ll enjoy for a change.
Yep I sound like a nerd. Sue me. Believe it or not I DID actually come here to STUDY the different courses were one of the MAJOR appeals to me in coming here at all.

Guelph itself is a lot like Adelaide, so honestly I don’t find myself overly home sick. I miss certain people and places but I’m finding it pretty easy to just slot right in here and just get on with things. My house mates are all very chilled, and bar a few minor ticks incredibly easy to get along with and live with. I really love nights where we all end up in the living room and actually have a real conversation and socialise properly with one another. It’s really easy in these townhouses to just end up locked in your room and not really interact with your house mates, so it’s kinda nice that we occasionally break that trend. We all sat down and played this RIDICULOUS game that Cassie bought from the dollar store. It was a DVD game based on a Japanese game show where you essentially watch clips of these stupid scenarios and place bets on the outcomes. Some are just hilariously stupid – a couple were downright unsettling. My favourite, and possibly the most disturbing, was one wherein there were two guys with a metal pole between their legs (hear me out), and each had to rub the pole for a certain amount of time. Whichever one managed to increase the temperature of the pole the most was the winner, and you had to bet on who you thought would win.
Yeah… that game was insane.
What was more hilarious was that Cassie won and she insisted that it was obvious that the guy who won looked lonelier bahaha.

I’ve encountered a few difficulties being here, but most of them are pretty minor. For example, because I’ve never had to shop or cook for myself, just figuring out what to buy and what not to buy and how much to cook etc has been something of a learning curve for me. People who have lived out of home for ages would probably laugh at that, but it’s actually more difficult than I anticipated. The major concern I have though is money. I feel like I’m burning through it incredibly quickly because things here are far more expensive than I was banking on. Just getting set up with things that I couldn’t pack feels like it cost an absolute fortune, and there were a few things I feel really stupid for not having sorted out back home. For example, by far my stupidest oversight was shoes. I threw a couple of pairs in my suitcase with very little consideration for the fact that I DO NOT HAVE A CAR over here thus WALK EVERYWHERE. This wouldn’t be a problem normally, but because my ankle still gives me a fair bit of grief (especially in the colder weather), I really needed shoes with proper support that would be able to go the distance. Ballet flats and converses simply weren’t cutting the mustard. I was absolutely kicking myself for not AT LEAST bringing my runners. I bought a really cheap pair of runners (from the Canadian equivalent of Spendless Shoes) but they were hardly appropriate to be worn with skirts and tights. I felt ridiculously conspicuous. After watching Hollie walk around in some awesome vintage combat boots and talking to a lot of different Canadians about what they get around in in Winter, I eventually realised I was going to have to bite the bullet and buy something decent. Shopping here is painful, because Guelph has very little competition so getting things cheap is not easy. I forked out the most I have ever paid for a pair of shoes in my life for a really sturdy pair of Dr. Martens. I gotta say, whilst the price left me absolutely reeling (and damn Canadian tax only being added on at the point of sale! It is KILLING me) I’m pretty much in love with them. The difference as soon as I put them on was amazing, and walking around is going to be so much more comfortable now. Whilst the price makes me want to cry a lot, I have to admit they’re a solid investment, and I picked a pair that literally goes with EVERYTHING I brought over here (I was incredibly tempted to buy this wicked pair of brown ones, but I eventually had to be honest with myself that forking out $150 Canadian plus tax for a pair of shoes that did not match EVERYTHING I owned was absolutely ridiculous).
Another rude shock money-wise was the printer. I don’t even know what the difference is any more, but in the end what I was expecting to cost me around $50 ended up being around $120. And once again, it was a solid investment because I’ve already made a lot of use of it and ALL my history readings are online so printing them out will save me a lot of hassle, but I was simply not prepared for it.

However, at the end of the day all those big things that made me cringe violently and die a little inside to hand over my VISA for are one-offs, and I’ve managed to sort out my weekly groceries pretty damned well now. The meal plan I bought with my school fees is proving to be an absolute godsend for making things easier and keeping lunch costs down. That said, I’ve realised I need to be a lot more careful with what I eat and buy as it’s far too easy to fall into my usual incredibly poor eating habits.

Only other relatively important thing to report is that it looks like a possibility that I’ll be traveling alone at the end of the school semester. Nothing is set in stone yet, but I’m having to alter my plans to account for the possibility. I’m actually pretty chilled with this idea. I’m feeling pretty confident that I’ll be able to make it work and get a real kick out of seeing whatever the heck I want and going wherever the heck I choose. I’ve also been looking into couchsurfing.org and I’m thinking I’ll make use of it. Not only as a way to keep costs down (accommodation is never cheap), but also because I think it sounds like a wicked way to meet people. Yes hostels are good for that too, but I think I might do better with the couchsurfing environment and being able to be a little selective about the types of people you pick out to stay with and befriend. I really think it seems like a great way to get to properly know some new people (something I admit I’ve been very very lazy about over here). I’ve messaged the ambassador for Guelph, so I think I’ll meet up with him and ask a few questions and see where it takes me. I’m pretty content to go with the flow for the present.

Well now that you’ve had a HUGE wall of text, have some photos (if you have me on facebook, you’ll have seen these already):

The best ice cream in Canada need not be wiped from your mouth when taking a photo! ... especially when you don't realise it's there -facepalm-

From the Maid of the Mist

The Canadian falls - FAR more impressive, but generally less photogenic because they kick up more mist

American Falls

Niagara-on-the-Lake. Can I live there?

Even the lamp posts are pretty there!

That’s it from me today. I have readings to do, sleep to catch up on, and classes to attend.
Take care of yourselves! Miss you all!

P.S. Squirrel count: 85

I digress.

Sir Wombat and I had a most wonderful time in the Arboretum. I increased my squirrel count to 28, encountered my first chipmunks and just generally enjoyed being outside. It was a beautiful day for it too. Keen to see how these pictures compare to when the snow sets in too.

General prettiness.

Sir Wombat likes to walk on the edge

I'm quite keen to just sit there for a while

We're not in Kansas any more...

Sir Wombat enjoying the Fauna

Sir Wombat is intrigued by the sign. As was I, 'cos it's not Winter and believe me that trail needed some maintenance

Getting pics of these guys is impossible. They are SO QUICK.

The Chipmunks were far more cooperative

He is displeased because he thinks I'm after his food

Sir Wombat checks him out

Until next time!

Friday I’ll take a proper walk around the uni and through the arbortum so I’ll have more interesting pics to put up (not to mention more relevant). Saturday I have a Niagra Falls trip (excitement plus!) so I’ll have more to report then too. In the interim, here’s what I’ve snapped the past couple of days:

Pep rally - spot the Steph!

Pep rally

Duke Wilfred Huffington the Third says hello to Aries, our new fish

Sir Wombat (his shortened name) says hello to the other new kid, Athena

My latest batch of anti-drop-dead pills. The pill bottle made me laugh

My treat for the week ($5) to make the room feel more homey... taking bets on how long I keep it alive for

Our door in all its glory

The condom and candy jar! Why? Well actually there's a pretty good logic behind it.

This just appealed to my low humour threshold

Lego candy! I think I'd just play with it though

I found this decidedly creepy

Proof that I can occasionally cook for myself

In one of the theatre buildings. I thought it was cool

Random entryway. Also something I just thought was pretty

Toffee apple shop in the mall - INSANE

And with that, I must head to bed.

P.S. Squirrel count: 16

This is going to be a short on text update, as frankly I find myself slowly becoming comatose. I think jetlag is still getting to me a bit.
Settling in here fine. All my housemates are officially moved in and I know where all my classes are now (theoretically – I still need approval for one of my courses -shakes fist at the absent prof-). Classes officially start tomorrow, so I’ll be getting an early night tonight – although given my inability to stay awake most days that isn’t saying a lot. Sent off the first batch of postcards but still have another 10 or so to write out and send, so if others get theirs before you don’t be offended. I’ve had to break up the sending anyway because honestly it was going to cost me a fortune to send them all in one go.

Friday I’ll take a proper walk around the uni and through the arbortum so I’ll have more interesting pics to put up. Saturday I have a Niagra Falls trip (excitement plus!) so I’ll have more to report then too. In the interim, here’s what I’ve snapped the past couple of days:

Pep rally - spot the Steph!

Pep rally

Duke Wilfred Huffington the Third says hello to Aries, our new fish

Sir Wombat (his shortened name) says hello to the other new kid, Athena

My latest batch of anti-drop-dead pills. The pill bottle made me laugh

My treat for the week ($5) to make the room feel more homey... taking bets on how long I keep it alive for

Our door in all its glory

The condom and candy jar! Why? Well actually there's a pretty good logic behind it.

This just appealed to my low humour threshold

Lego candy! I think I'd just play with it though

I found this decidedly creepy

Proof that I can occasionally cook for myself

In one of the theatre buildings. I thought it was cool

Random entryway. Also something I just thought was pretty

Toffee apple shop in the mall - INSANE

The room is huge, which is funny because mine is so bare. It’s truly comical when you compare it to Cassie’s which is delightfully full of homey touches.

I have started a tally of how many squirrels I see. I’m up to four. I’m hoping to reach a truly absurd number by the time I leave here.

Onward to photos:

My present from Hollie <3 SO ADORABLE.

Cheap compared to Aus? Heck yes!

Dunkaroos gone insane!

4 of 4 haha

My little cupboard of win!

My housemate made these awesome stencils for decoration. These are my favs!

THEY BE AFTER ME LUCKY CHARMS

View from my room

Desk... exciting.

View when you walk in

Side view of desk

Bed

My bookcase is so empty

Wardrobe - I lack coathangers so temporary solution

My ingenious solution to needing so many adaptors

Too tired. That is all.

Keep safe
xx

Photoblog for the win.

Scrapbooking stuff for Monica

Cupcakes with Danielle

She approves

Gettin' touristy with Anton and Emma

I love it when people turn my characters into pretty art

Adorable? Yes. Totally eat your face off? Yes.

One last trip to the UniBar

Edmund, meet Wentworth

We say farewell in style

I shall miss Shaun's lapdances -sniffles-

Unimpressed? Disinterested? Both?

Glowsticks for the win! Thanks James

This guy = epic top bloke.

And this kid just rocks my rainbow toe socks

Mmmm pretty candles

One day her cuteness will cause my head to implode

There was valid reason for the awkward barnyard.

Thanks Elyse <3

And Mez!

Well played Adelaide. Well played.

78 hours and 11 minutes to go.

So what’s new? I’ve had three 21st birthdays since I last posted, plus been spending time with awesome people and occasionally baking (but trying to limit it). I finally got the bandage off my foot this morning, so I look like a normal person (although don’t try to get me to run like one). Had a girl’s night which was EPIC amounts of fun (I will merely say; “the unhappy meal”), and had a handful of people over one night because my parents were in Brisbane and I found myself bored as hell in the empty house. Ended up kicking on till 6.30 in the morning – never in my life have I been more grateful to get back to bed. Caught up with Monica and Bec, spent some one on one time with Elyse, headed into town with Emma and Damon and a handful of others. I probably did many more things, but frankly I’m too tired to think (SOMEONE has stuffed up my sleeping patterns =P).
Basically, my life is awesome right now. And filled with awesome people. Awesome.

In a completely unrelated note, the TV is advertising something called a “magic bullet” in the background, and it’s decidedly unnerving. Or maybe I just have a sick mind.

Canada prep is almost entirely completed. I am somewhere between being hugely excited and decidedly terrified. Mostly I’m choosing not to think about it so I can refrain from freaking out.

So since I am far too tired to really continue this in any sort of coherent manner, have some photos:

He's staring at me. He's trying to make me feel guilty about eating him.

Duke Wilfred Huffington the Third. Sir Wombat to his friends.

Awesome people, awesome times

And now I need sushi.
… and a nap.

So two things to share today. Firstly, I went to the zoo with Amy yesterday Amy is a gold member of zoos SA, so she gets free entry for herself and a friend. She also volunteers there, so on her way in to sort out some “official” stuff, she was kind enough to pick me up and take me with her.
I ADORE the zoo. In fact when I go to Toronto there’s a good chance I’ll take two days out just to make sure I see all of Toronto zoo haha.
But I digress.

Funi says hello

Have I mentioned that I LOVE bunnies? No? Okay. I FREAKING LOVE BUNNIES this one is named Bubbles

Joeys (I just realised I don't know the correct plural of Joey) chillin' in the sun

I'd love a pet quokka. Just to see people's blank expressions when I say "I have a quokka"

Yes, the tigers at Adelaide zoo ACTUALLY EXIST

And they go fishing with their tails it seems.

That looks... strangely comfortable actually

Lion Love!

I ADORE Wombats. I think I'll have to run a small wildlife rescue when I'm retired just to get my hands on one XD

Pensive meerkat is pensive

For Damon hehe

My favourite animal of all time - the red panda! Sadly ever since they moved their enclosure to be with the giant pandas, I've never seen these guys because they hide in their hut most of the day. I happened to catch one just as I was leaving. I melt! <3

Was a good day although my ankle is killing me today as punishment. Clearly I am not permitted to walk that much.

So today I decided to bake something, predominantly because I have people coming over tonight who can consume it and also because it’s been ages since I’ve done so. Unfortunately, these REALLY didn’t turn out as nice as I hoped. I’ve been trying to find a recipe I once used a while ago, but I didn’t document where it came from. I’ve been eliminating the possibilities one by one, and sadly this was NOT it. Furthermore, the icing on this recipe was sub-par at best. As a result, I won’t post the recipe because honestly it’s not worth making yourself. However, enjoy some photos of the process!

In the beginning, there was butter, castor sugar and vanilla bean paste

Then self-raising flour and milk were added to this

These were baked, but the Steph was dissatisfied.

The icing also lacked that certain je ne sais quoi.

It also lead to an unholy amount of cleaning up

Steph then attempted to use a piping bag for the first time in her life... and it was not good.

But still...

It could have been worse.

So that’s my failure for the day. And yes I know the icing looks dreadful. I have no idea what possessed me to try green icing. And I’ve never attempted to properly pipe icing on before, and I proved to be very bad at it haha. Plus my piping bag was split and missing one of the attachments, so I’m pretty certain it was far more difficult than it should rightly be. It also didn’t help that the recipe for the icing itself was quite lacking, both in flavour and texture. Won’t be using that one again.

And now I am off… I think I might take a nap.

1. Last minute assignments
2. Exams
3. Returning to work
4. Cramming as much social activity as is humanly possible into my days in hopes of seeing as many people as I can before I leave for Canada
5. I haven’t really been doing anything worth reading about.

So what can I tell you? I picked up a book for the first time in months and loved it. I read “Meridian” by Amber Kizer which I’d been eyeing off on thebookdepository.co.uk for ages.

Behold the precious

Apparently it was FINALLY released here in Australia, because I happened across it in K-Mart when I was shopping with mum (we were purchasing winter clothing for Canada because it came to our attention that I don’t own any… I just never get cold here XD). Mum very kindly bought it for me. The literary equivalent of a chick-flick, but surprisingly well-written and surprisingly more original than most of the teen crap I’ve been reading (and loving) lately. However, I also decided to get a start on my plans to start reading “real” books (i.e. get the hell out of the young adult section in the book stores and start reading things that are actually going to improve my own writing). As a result, I’m currently reading “The Raw Shark Texts” by Steven Hall (another one I’ve been eyeing off at thebookdepository for a long time).

The only picture I could find of the version I have. It's so tiny XD

I’m very early into it, but I can’t seem to make up my mind as to whether I love it or am repulsed by it, and whether I find it brilliant or completely pretentious. I’m leaning towards loving it and thinking it’s brilliant so far. Either way, I’m pretty sure LSD was taken in the process of writing it. I’d explain what it’s about, but frankly it might cause your head to implode just a little bit.
… actually I totally have to tell you.
Essentially it’s about a guy who has a dissociative disorder (for those of you who haven’t wasted three years in a Psychology degree, that basically means that he doesn’t remember a single thing about his life), except he’s a bit weird because instead of recovering from it he keeps starting all over again and forgetting everything again. Only it turns out that he’s not mental. It turns out that… creatures… have found a way to live in the environment created by human communication. They have a very complex way of explaining it, but essentially the easiest way to put it is to say that they’re “conceptual” creatures… only alive and totally capable of doing damage. So what’s this got to do with the main character?
He’s being hunted by a mother-freaking existential shark. It’s eating his memories. That’s why he keeps forgetting everything.
I’ll give you a minute to absorb that.
…
…
…
Yep. I have to say though, if you can get passed the total weirdness of it that only an English student could love (and oh how we do <3), it’s incredibly well-written. I’m not far into it mind you, so it might end up being awful -shrugs-

He may not be real but he's totally gonna getcha.

So what else is new? Eh various things I’m too lazy to think about right now. Instead, have a portfolio piece that helped me get a decent grade in my creative writing subject this semester:

“I’m watching as he falls out of the lemon tree. His hands are scraped and he’s telling the young me not to worry because his mum’s a nurse and his dad’s a cop so he knows how to take care of himself. The young me grins stupidly, shyly, as though trying not to show the unforgotten concern.
She, or me I suppose, is seven. Already far too tall for her age and encased in puppy fat that will disappear one day but that she will never really believe is gone. I step out from my hiding place and hand the bewildered boy a band-aid. They both stare, this boy Shannan and this younger me. She is not pleased because she sees how Shannan looks at me, and knows immediately that a woman of twenty holds far more appeal to a fourteen year old boy than a seven year old girl ever could. I shoot her a sympathetic smile. I remember that jealousy.
“Better get used to it.” I think, but keep it to myself.”

and have some more jibberish, unmarked and unedited, from my onepageperday nonsense:

“I’m waking from a dream. Consciousness is tearing at the corners of my eyes, violently criss-crossed and red and burning. A voice is screaming in my head.
“Wake up.”
It must be me I think. A strange jumbled accent that everyone is forever telling me I speak with as they guess where I’m from; America? England? Canada? I purse my lips and crush my eyelids tighter together. No, not yet. I don’t want to wake up yet. I’m beginning to feel the world around me, all of it rapidly coming into focus in my waking mind. I don’t want it. I struggle, fighting back the softness of my mattress pressing into the small of my back, fighting against the vague brightness of the morning light burning through my closed eyes. Please no. Not yet. “

Awww why not one more:

“She blinks. She waits. She bites her lip and shifts her feet.
“I need to go.” she says, but she doesn’t explain why. She never was any good at being clear. I stare blankly and I know that she knows I’m annoyed. My arms are folded and I’m looking down at her like she’s a child. She’s unperturbed. It’s not me that’s making her nervous.
“I’m going.” She’s more forceful this time. I cock an eyebrow, just one, as though I’m daring her to do it. To take that step in the opposite direction.
“You can’t make me stay.” And there’s the girl I know. There’s the Nella I know. She’s stood up straight finally, eyes defiantly looking straight into mine. Now she looks real. Now she looks like the immoveable object I know her to be. I wave a hand, gesturing that she can leave. She doesn’t move. Remains perfectly still in her ballerina posture. This time it is her who arches a brow curiously at me. I laugh, but it sounds hollow even to me, echoing off the bookshelves surrounding us.
“You need to learn to get on without me.” Nella purrs, smiling deviously. Her shift in tone throws me. Now I’m the one looking down and shuffling my bare feet in the thick carpet. She’s right. She often is. It never ceases to drive me crazy, but I can’t pretend I haven’t noticed. She’s far too aware of it for me to deceive her on that point. She clucks her tongue and shakes her head at my refusal to answer. She wants me to defend myself and frankly I just can’t be bothered. I dare a glance up at her and am invariably met with an angry stare. I open my mouth to speak but she’s tired of waiting. She turns and walks away, heels clicking as soon as she’s far enough away to hit the tile. I breathe out, unaware I’d been holding my breath.”

And now sleep!

Topic: “The truth is…”

The truth is that, frankly, I get bored sometimes. I’m not an evil person, I don’t go out and provoke people for no good reason. The trouble is that from where I’m standing, being bored is a plenty good reason to take action – even if that action is not necessarily pleasant to those I might involve. So, okay, I admit maybe I shouldn’t have made Johnny my partner in crime. Poor old Johnny never was quick on the uptake. Skinny as a rail, flexible as a gymnast, but with that tell-tale vacant grin that told you he was a few fries short of a happy meal. The poor guy would do just about anything to get a smile out of a pretty girl, and I was convinced (at the time, though I will grant that on reflection I realised my logic may not have been as flawless as I thought it was) that it would make Georgie Sparks have a laugh. Okay, yes, she’d be laughing AT someone, but Georgie didn’t strike me as the type who would mind the distinction, and I don’t think Johnny would have known the difference. Kenny… well yeah I admit Kenny was an unfortunate part of the whole thing. But hey it’s collateral damage right? All for the greater cause etc, etc?
And as I’ve said, curing my boredom was DEFINITELY a greater cause.

Topic: “I need proof…”

I need proof that people see me certain ways. I try my best not to be one of those who grasps desperately for the approval of others, fingers clasping tightly to vacant shreds of compliments not really intended as such… but I am. I sit there and I smile and I simper and I nod and I wait for someone to tell me I’m doing a good job. Why is it that humanity struggles to just TELL each other when we’re doing the right thing? I don’t get riled up about many injustices in the world, but I have to admit that that has always got to me. Like this niggling sensation. A mosquito bite that itches right down to the bone. I know it’s wrong. It’s got to be, right? It cannot be right to do nothing but punish the bad. Psychology itself tells us that’s not effective, so why do we persist? Oh don’t get me wrong. I guess some places try. Like those paltry work incentives that big businesses hand out on silver platters, drawn up by business consultants who tell them to improve their work “culture” with a cheap plaque to say “well done!” In that particular scenario, I think I’d rather have the money it took to make the stupid thing.

Topic: “A long time ago…”

A long time ago, I had faith that you were coming home. Maybe ‘home’ is the wrong choice of words. I guess you never really thought of here as ‘home’, but it was home to me, so I suppose I just figured it felt that way to everyone. Even after you made it clear it wasn’t, part of me still expected you to walk through that door with your usual lopsided grin, holding a book. I don’t know why I’d expect it to be a book. Maybe just because of the way you talk, like you expect every word you say to be some great pearl of wisdom delivered only after weeks and months of deliberation. Time and thought like that which went into the imaginary book in your hands.
Frankly, I know now that it’s your loss. So you can keep your imaginary books, but more than that, you can keep your “pearls” of wisdom. Because frankly, I think you’re mostly just full of shit.

Topic: “I turned the corner, and there, coming towards me was…”

I turned the corner, and there, coming towards me was Carrie. Sweet, delicious Carrie, with her candy hair and liquorice earrings. She was chewing bubblegum absently, her peppermint eyes staring off into a distant sky. I wanted to get her attention but I stalled, watching instead as she blew a bubble and let it pop with a loud resounding snap. She picked it carefully from her eyelashes as I inhaled the strawberry waft the pop had blown my way. Now would, theoretically, be the time to interrupt her.
(I think I must have been hungry. I was imagining a candy world. Awesome.)

I don’t pretend to understand my psyche either.

I got incredibly sick of Psychology study today, so I decided to whip up a very quick batch of Apple Cinnamon Muffins. I chose these because they take me the least time to make (essential when you should be studying) and they require limited ingredients, which suited my very limited pantry/fridge well.

Drool over it. You know you want to.

This recipe comes from the muffin cookbook I’ve used for as long as I can remember – Muffin Mania, by Cathy Prange and Joan Pauli. I’ve altered it to suit my tastes over the years. I know the original used more flour, and used a mix of whole wheat and normal. But today being unhealthy seemed the way to go!

Ingredients:

1/2 cup butter or margarine
3/4 cup white sugar
1 beaten egg
1 cup buttermilk
1 tsp. salt
1 1/2 cup diced apple (I use much more than this – just two whole apples cut up. I think it’s better with more. I also tend to use pink lady apples, but that’s just because they happen to be my favourite)
1 1/2 cup self-raising flour
1 tsp. cinnamon (I use more, but I’m a cinnamon junkie)

Topping:
2-3 tsp. white sugar
1 tsp cinnamon

Assemble your ingredients, lest you wish to be running around like a headless chook (as is my usual inclination)

It doesn't LOOK like it should result in something delicious

Blend the margarine, sugar and eggs till they’re smooth.

You can see the salt from the next step here, mostly because I forgot to take a picture before

Add buttermilk, salt, apples and mix well.

At this stage it reminds me of... something unpleasant

Stir together flour and cinnamon and add to the wet ingredients, stirring only to moisten.

This is the part of the recipe where it is most delicious to lick the spoons

Spoon into muffin tins and sprinkle with topping. Personally, I don’t sprinkle with the topping at this point. If you do, it will crystallise really nicely, but last time I tried it it weighed down the tops of the muffins and they looked incredibly odd. Instead, this time around I sprinkled it partway through the baking. I left it too late into the process but if you did it maybe halfway through you could reach a happy medium.
Bake for 20 mins, at 180 degrees celsius. Serve with a small amount of butter, margarine or cream.

Onward to the oven!

Delicious Grandeur

And that’s it for today. Back to Psychology for me